Pictures:

Why was Timmy destined to become a tennis pro?

He raised a racket since he was young.

377

Why do some of these instruments look different from the others?

They're members of the opposite sax.

826

Where does one go to purchase unmovable objects?

A stationery store

295

What did the cop say to the driver who offered a bribe?

Fine.

1479

Why did the newborn require immediate surgery?

He was born with a silver spoon in his mouth.

1274

Was the snack food factory worker hurt when the machine exploded?

No, but had a chip on his shoulder.

1815

What sickness does one get from building too hot a fire in a ski cottage?

Cabin fever

704

Is the quantum physics theory about electrons disappearing and reappearing elsewhere really true?

That's neither here nor there.

878

Why is lumping people together not a good practice?

Because to average them is "mean".

782

What is a caveman's favorite meal?

A club sandwich.

202

How were crews asked to stop construction of this hospital due to delayed permits?

Please hold the Mayo.

791

What happens when a hit ball that collides with a bird?

It's ruled a fowl ball

898