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Why do many people choose low-fat milk?

Whole milk wheys them down.

1074

What did the cop say to the driver who offered a bribe?

Fine.

1479

What is the study of focusing on others called?

Yourology

1116

How did the podiatrist react to having no patients all week?

De-feeted

498

Why did the weasel go to prison?

The mink stole.

1042

How did guests know chili would be served at the party?

Somebody spilled the beans.

1822

Why did the pastry chef cut her chocolate cake at such sharp angles?

She wanted Brownie points

211

What's a good name for a plumbing supply distributor?

Sink Inc.

982

What did the mother do whose son chewed on an electrical cord?

She grounded him until he conducted himself properly.

433

What is the study of vintage radios called?

Radiology

1998

Why are jellyfish so mean?

Because they're spineless.

1061

Why did the mother have sore hands?

She had meta-carpools.

1064