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What did the clock repairman say when you asked when the talking clock will be fixed?

Time will tell.

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What do you call and aunt that doesn't like people?

Aunt Tipathy

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How can psychiatrists charge so much?

Because people have to be crazy to pay those rates.

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What do you call a state that is really into dancing?

A swing state.

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What is a side-trip on a vacation called?

A detour on de tour.

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What is an ancient Celtic who is very flexible called?

A fluid druid.

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Why is this inspiring?

It says 'Eye can!'

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If the animals on Noah's ark could play musical instruments, what would it be called?

An arkestra.

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What dinosaur has a good vocabulary?

The thesaurus.

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What are building blocks made from sim cards called?

Sim City.

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When Nancy suggested putting grated cheese on the salad, what was everyone's reaction?

They thought it was grate.

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How would you describe Luke Skywalker if he's not that friendly?

Luke warm.

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