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Akiva Lane
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What being always acts and feels lousy?

The louse.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call someone who measures how much status people have?

A statustician

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Jimmy wonder where the planet Noyd is?

Because his mother said she was a Noyd.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call it when the mother and midwife work hard together to give birth to a baby?

A labor union.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a small circle that is very relaxed?

Dot calm.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a group of cars that are flooded after a hurricane?

A car pool.

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Akiva Lane
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What is a good slogan for a company that makes lox?

We know the key to the lox.

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Akiva Lane
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What happens to the toy drones that start by themselves?

They're flying off the shelves.

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Akiva Lane
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What did the rancher say to the person he thought was taking down parts of his fence?

I'm accusing you, but I hope you don't take offence.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Billy find it hard to learn grammar involving the past and future?

It made him tense.

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Akiva Lane
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What happened when the horses ran away from the farm?

It destabilized the farm.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was Benjy, who was quite large, like a clock?

His nickname was Big Ben.

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