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When Jerry looked at his legs, how did he know that he was eating too much?

His calves had become cows.

955

Why does a letter C emerging from the ground have to be dealt with immediately?

It's an emergent C.

3002

Why wasn't the company making money?

Its strategy made no cents.

1945

Why did the unemployed actor break his leg?

He wanted to be in a cast.

406

Why is this cable similar to the United States?

They are both C to shining C

3248

What has one eye, no mouth, and everyone agrees that it always makes a good point.

A needle.

1591

Why were the angels that were getting married so happy?

It was a marriage made in heaven.

2796

Which U.S. city do people have the hardest time losing weight?

Gainesville, FL

422

What is it called when a leader demands that everyone kneel down to him?

Tyra-knee.

694

What do you call a plane that is not fancy?

A plain plane.

30

Why didn't the chicken cross the road?

Because it was chicken.

543

What flower is named after a part of the head?

Tulips.

2055