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Akiva Lane
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Why did people think the silent owl didn't care about things?

Because it didn't give a hoot.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Alan make sure his deck wasn't empty when he played with his kids?

He wanted to make sure he was playing with a full deck.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call and aunt that doesn't like people?

Aunt Tipathy

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Akiva Lane
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What was James Bond's nickname when he travelled a lot?

Vaga Bond

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What spice did Betty avoid adding to recipes?

Because she felt people didn't taste it, it was a waste of Thyme.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the plural of plea?

Please.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Joe race Fred to the punch-bowl at the party?

He wanted to beat him to the punch.

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Akiva Lane
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How did the pitcher learn to throw curve balls?

It was a learning curve.

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Akiva Lane
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When Anne's mother suggested that she learn how to play bridge, what was Anne's response?

I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

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Akiva Lane
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When do you stop looking for something?

When you find it.

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Akiva Lane
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Why do some people like to eat these?

It gives them a peas-ful feeling.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a state that is really into dancing?

A swing state.

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