Pictures:

Why did people think the silent owl didn't care about things?

Because it didn't give a hoot.

2416

Why did Alan make sure his deck wasn't empty when he played with his kids?

He wanted to make sure he was playing with a full deck.

1738

What do you call and aunt that doesn't like people?

Aunt Tipathy

1913

What was James Bond's nickname when he travelled a lot?

Vaga Bond

2170

What spice did Betty avoid adding to recipes?

Because she felt people didn't taste it, it was a waste of Thyme.

1546

What is the plural of plea?

Please.

2741

Why did Joe race Fred to the punch-bowl at the party?

He wanted to beat him to the punch.

1538

How did the pitcher learn to throw curve balls?

It was a learning curve.

1144

When Anne's mother suggested that she learn how to play bridge, what was Anne's response?

I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

788

When do you stop looking for something?

When you find it.

2163

Why do some people like to eat these?

It gives them a peas-ful feeling.

3138

What do you call a state that is really into dancing?

A swing state.

1888