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Akiva Lane
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What did Beverly say to the nut platter?

You're all nuts!

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Akiva Lane
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What is ironic when we eat food because we don't want it to go to waste?

Often that's the food that DOES go to waist.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Betty watch the weeds grow in the vacant lot?

Because she enjoyed it as the plot thickened.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the heaviest soup?

One Ton soup.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Bobby feel when he spilled a jar of olive oil on himself in the morning?

It was too oily in the morning.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Matt run in the desert?

For the big race, he wanted to make a dry run.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Jim and Beth take one evening a week from their family life to eat dates?

Because that was their date night.

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When the prices of houses go up, why do their roofs get weaker?

Because the prices go through the roof.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the leopard go the empty parking lot and go from one parking space to another?

It wanted to prove wrong those said it couldn't change its spots.

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What do you call an engineer that dries out the water from streams?

An ex-stream-ist.

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Akiva Lane
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What did Ben say when the tanks came and saved his village during the war?

Tanks.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did they hang the criminal?

He was looking for a loophole, and he found one.

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