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What vegetables were on strike?

The onions, because they were onion-ized.

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Why didn't Billy like the second class of his school day?

He felt like a second class citizen.

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What kind of carrots are worth their weight in gold?

24 karats.

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What does a baker with a high IQ bake?

Smart cookies.

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What is similar between a mother with a child and furniture that stores clothes?

They are both dressers.

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What is the opposite of an 'out voice', and what must be done with it?

An invoice, and it must be paid.

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What animal got kicked out of school?

The cheetah.

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What did the husband say when he brought his wife flowers?

This bud's for you.

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Why did the runner not tie his sneakers?

Because he wanted to win, and not be tied.

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What is built into the walls at Microsoft headquarters?

Microsoft windows.

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How do you get rid of weeds?

You have to get to the root of the problem.

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Why did the politician take a part-time job as a cashier?

He wanted to learn more about change.

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