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Akiva Lane
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Why were Bill's friends always calling him up?

Because his nickname was 'Up'.

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Akiva Lane
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When Jim made a party on his yacht, why did he try not to invite too many people?

He didn't want to go overboard.

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Akiva Lane
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What are axes that are used by criminals called?

Axes of Evil.

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Akiva Lane
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What company is similar to how Sammy used to have a rock band?

Sam Sung.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a chemical that makes you laugh?

A comical chemical.

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Akiva Lane
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What happened to Bill?

He tripped while he was on a trip.

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Akiva Lane
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Why wasn't Alan impressed with the running track inside of the windmill?

It was just run of the mill.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Jim feel when he found he loved working at the call center, talking to interesting people all day?

He felt that he had found his calling.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was Ed surprised he had a moustache?

He didn't shave there for a while, and it happened under his nose.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a tree with poems attached to it?

Poet tree.

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Akiva Lane
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What happened to the college when it didn't want to give its teachers a raise in salary?

It lost its faculties.

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What is an example of a contact sport where nobody touches anyone else?

When people hide each others' contact lenses.

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