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Akiva Lane
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Why did Joe go to the paint store to lose weight?

He went to get thinner.

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Akiva Lane
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When the room where people were allowed to make mistakes closed down, how was it described?

Now there is no room for error.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was Sara confused when she learned about animals on a farm?

She couldn't understand how you could fit animals into a pen?

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Akiva Lane
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What kind of doctor is similar to a boring teacher?

An anesthesiologiest - they both put people to sleep.

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Akiva Lane
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What bird is very curious about people?

The owl, because is always saying 'Who, who?'

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Akiva Lane
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What is a side-trip on a vacation called?

A detour on de tour.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the publisher make wide margins when printing the Book of the Prophets?

He wanted wide Prophet margins.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Oedipus feel after he found out what he had done?

He felt like an Oedipus wreck.

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Akiva Lane
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What did Maxine do when she lost her job?

She wrote a resume in order to resume working.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the person who smoked too much go to Istanbul on a cold day right after Thanksgiving?

Because he wanted to go cold Turkey.

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Akiva Lane
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What are magazines called that agree with the viewpoint of Donald Trump?

MAGA zines.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Billy ask his father to take a baseball bat and a bird to the baseball game?

Because he liked bat man and robin.

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